Emma

  • ask me anything
  • submit a post
  • rss
  • archive
  • teashoesandhair:

    If you think you’ve hit rock bottom, just remember that my bank once froze my accounts because I bought a healthy ready meal at my local supermarket and they classed it an ‘uncharacteristic purchase’

    (via zackisontumblr)

    • 7 years ago
    • 293376 notes
  • just-shower-thoughts:

    If we don’t accept refugees because 2 out of 100 M&M’s are poisoned then why is it OK the have “a few bad apples” in a police department?

    • 7 years ago
    • 41105 notes
  • (via isnt)

    • 7 years ago
    • 293767 notes
  • bigmoutheyebrows:
“ LOOK AT THIS CRAIGSLIST LISTING
”

    bigmoutheyebrows:

    LOOK AT THIS CRAIGSLIST LISTING 

    (via perks-of-being-chinese)

    • 7 years ago
    • 140348 notes
  • just-shower-thoughts:

    With the iPhone 7 not having a headphone jack, it makes me appreciate all the times my ear buds saved my phone from hitting the ground.

    • 7 years ago
    • 2939 notes
  • spookyguacamole:

    Spice World was a cinematic masterpiece and fuck you for thinking otherwise.

    one of the most climactic and tense moments in cinematic history

    (via 2000ish)

    • 7 years ago
    • 293091 notes
  • just-shower-thoughts:

    IF УФЦ TЧPЗ IИ FДКЭ CУЯILLIC, IT IS LIКЗ HДVIЙG Д PФLЧДLPHДЬЭTIC CУPHЗЯ THДT MДCHIИЭS CДЙИФT ЦЙDЗЯSTДИD, ЪЦT БЯДIЙS CДИ

    • 7 years ago
    • 11199 notes
  • (via allteeensrelate)

    • 7 years ago
    • 22437 notes
  • YO THIS GIRL JUST STRAIGHT UP CAME OVER TO MY LITTLE TABLE AT THE FOOD COURT IN THE MALL AND KNOCKED MY SHIT OFF OF IT CLAIMING I WAS HAVING SEX WITH HER DUDE. I ALMOST GOT INTO A FIGHT WITH A HEAVY SET RACIALLY AMBIGUOUS WOMAN. HER BOYFRIEND WAS THERE AND CAME OVER AND THEY STARTED ARGUING ABOUT HOW I WASN’T REALLY THE GIRL AND IM LIKE BRUH, MY LOADED FRIES THOUGH. I WAS PISSED. I MADE THAT GIRL GET ME ANOTHER LOADED FRY AND LEMONADE AND TOLD HER TO LEAVE HIS WACK AS IF HE MAKES HER ACT LIKE THAT. ESPECIALLY IF HE DIDNT EVEN HAVE MONEY ON HIM TO BUY ME ANOTHER LOADED FRY KNOWING DAMN WELL HE WAS PARTIALLY RESPONSIBLE TOO. THERE IS A MORAL TO THIS STORY AND I FEEL LIKE I’D BE DOING ALL OF YOU A DISSERVICE IF I DID NOT SHARE IT: ALWAYS COUNT YOUR FRIES. COUNT OTHER PEOPLES FRIES. COUNT ALL FRIES. BECAUSE I WAS ALMOST DONE WITH MY LOADED FRIES. IT WAS ONLY LIKE FOUR FRIES LEFT. AND I GOT A WHOLE NEW ONE FOR FREE BECAUSE THOSE TWO WEREN’T SMART ENOUGH TO LOOK ON THE GROUND AND COUNT FOR THEMSELVES. THIS IS A TRUE STORY AND I AM CACKLINGGGGG

    (via allteeensrelate)

    • 7 years ago
    • 202640 notes
  • actionables:

    too-hilarious:

    actionables:

    actionables:

    cute new neighbor just knocked to ask if he could borrow an egg from us
    then he asked if I could summarize to him how pancakes are made
    now I am going over to his place to teach him how to make them

    cute new neighbor now knows how to make pancakes

    Does cute new neighbour now know anything else???

    my number

    (via allteeensrelate)

    • 7 years ago
    • 84272 notes
© 2013–2023 Emma
Next page
  • Page 1 / 1051